Not a soft, cuddly toy lioness.

Not a woman whipping her hair about to smash the patriarchy kind of lioness.

This is not a metaphor.

I'm face to face with a real-life, breathing, fully-grown lioness.

Behind her is a second lioness.

And behind me is a third.

And they are hunting.

What is the one thing I need so that I can enjoy this moment that I've worked hard to find, and leave the situation with my life, and theirs, intact?

Have a think on that - we'll come back to it.

Every year, I go home to South Africa, and I seek them out. Lions.

They are the gold standard of the Big Five. They're the World Cup win.

And every year, I know that finding a lion, seeing one, interacting with one in the wild, is one of the trickiest things I can do.

I have to get up at 4 am every day (lions are nocturnal, and the earlier I get up, the greater the chance of seeing one).

I have to go out in the cold air - the tears and snot streaming down my face are a thing to behold.

And I have to spend up to eight hours a day searching.

I can do this for days and weeks, and I still might not find one.

Finding a lion in the wild in South Africa, is like going after the thing we most want in life. It's the big dream we all have. The goal for our careers. The promotion. The speaking gig. The dream client. The JOB.

We all have our own lion. Mine is the entertainment industry. It's the thing I've been committed to and chased since I was 22 years old.

Yours will be something else.

But reaching that thing, finding it, making it happen, is like finding a lion in the wild in South Africa:

👉Difficult to access

👉Deeply uncomfortable to do at times

👉And there's a risk of your destruction

Because even when you find a lion - it doesn't want you there. It doesn't acknowledge you. It is not your friend. And given half a chance, that lion will chase you down, bring you to the ground, suffocate you at the neck, rip chunks out of you and spit you out (apparently we don't taste very good).

That lion will reject you.

Just like the entertainment industry rejected me, and just like your dream, goal, desire has rejected you.

If you keep looking, and you keep searching, you will eventually find the lion.

And when you do it will be the most spectacular moment of your life. Time stands still. There is just you and this beast of magnificence. And all the work you did to find it pays off.

But in your hunt for the lion, there's something you need so that you can enjoy this moment that you've worked hard to find, and leave the situation with your life, and the lion's, intact.

Figured out what it is yet?

It's a car.

A simple car, with four very necessary requirements.

An engine

Wheels

Petrol

Windows that open and close

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That car will keep you safe. It's your vehicle of assurance against a grisly, bloody end. As you drive along looking for the lion, others things are going to cross your path. And they're all part of the journey to your destination - to the lion.

Elephants will cross the road - and if they're teenage males, they will charge you. The car helps you get away.

Buffalo will surround you. The car is a shield against their aggression.

You may come across a troupe of monkeys, all screeching, eating, fighting and being generally terrifying - your car is your safe place.

Just like your hunt for the lion, your pursuit of your goals and dreams requires a vehicle of assurance that will keep you protected - and the engine, wheels, petrol and windows that shut are the individual parts of the vehicle that make up the protection.

The engine is your breath. That is where you ground yourself, root yourself and take control of your racing heart and mind. Harness your breath, and you harness your fear and your thoughts. You take control, instead of external factors controlling you.

The wheels are your adaptability - your ability to move, shift and reshape yourself to the situation you find yourself in. This is very much about getting into the body. We're discouraged from this as we get older - but if we can rediscover our bodies, our thoughts have far less power over us. This is when we start to build confidence.

The petrol is your fuel - your passion, your drive. What is pushing you towards the things you want? How far will you go to get them? What won't you let stand in your way? And at what point would you be willing to say, it's enough. I'm done. I can't do this anymore. How full is your tank?

Your windows that open and shut - this is where you start to play. How much do you know? How educated are you? What are your past experiences? How do you prepare yourself for moments of rejection? Do you listen to music? Stretch? Read? Dance?

I found three lionesses in January. And I hung out with them for over an hour. I reversed with them as they walked up the road. I U-turned when they did and followed them back down the road. I turned off my engine and cracked the window open very slightly so I could hear them talking to each other. It was (and always is when I go home to South Africa and spend time in the wild) the closest to a godlike experience I can get to.

But I've been visiting them for 43 years. I know what's required for me to stay safe and to have the best experience. And I STILL don't know everything about them that there is to know.

In your life, the thing you most want is there. But the road to reaching it is PACKED with rejection. In the face of that rejection, you don't give up. Because if you really want the thing you want - giving up isn't an option. Instead you move down that road in your car.

With its engine (your breath)

Its wheels (your adaptability)

Its petrol (your fuel, fire and passion)

And the windows that shut (your knowledge, past experiences, preparation, education, rituals that keep you grounded and ready)

And then you face the rejection head-on and stare it in the eyes and go for it.

On 3 July, 42 years, 10 months and three days after I was born, I make my West End debut. I find my lion. The road has been tough, scary, full of doubt...it has almost destroyed my confidence and my soul at times.

But my vehicle is strong. Its tank is full. The engine is purrring loudly. And my windows are wide open - for now.

How are you approaching your lion? How are you moving through the rejection? How can you make your vehicle stronger?

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Ash

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